#83 - Unit-M - Issue 1 - Page 16 - in Unit-M - Issue 1 - 22nd Jan 2020, 2:16 PM

 

Unit-M - Issue 1 - Page 16

 

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...(RockB)

...(RockB) ...(RockB)

Hm, why "Derringer" now, after Simon addressed him as "Arthur" first? If Simon wants to ramp up the formality of the meeting, I'd rather think of "Mr. Derringer"...

(Edit: Typo removed.)

26th Jan 2020, 4:30 PM

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Hmmm.

There’s definitely something to how the different characters are addressing each other so far.

It’s not an accident that some are sticking with code names, whereas others are using first names, last names, and even nicknames.

Simon’s switch to “Derringer” instead of “Arthur” isn’t meant to be disrespectful. It’s supposed to be a subtle response to Blackout’s derogatory use of “Artie.”

“Derringer” is a pretty cool sounding last name. It almost sounds like a code name...

I can see why it might read as disrespectful though. I might change this dialogue. Not sure yet.

26th Jan 2020, 9:34 PM

...(RockB)

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>> It’s supposed to be a subtle response to Blackout’s derogatory use of “Artie.”

I figured that much...

Hmm, codename... Since it's his real name, it would be a poor codename, methinks, but then again, if he's proud about it, he could have chosen "Derringer" as his codename himself. And it sounds cool indeed. But if he was officially introduced during this meeting, only Simon and himself could know about the codename thing, so one of them should mention it.

27th Jan 2020, 4:43 AM

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Thought about this. Decided to change the dialogue so that now Simon says "Arthur."

This isn't super important, but I definitely don't want readers to think he's being disrespectful.

27th Jan 2020, 10:00 AM

...(RockB)

...(RockB) ...(RockB)

IMHO that's much better. On the next page, too.

27th Jan 2020, 7:53 PM

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